When Eva lost her first tooth, which I wrote about almost an exact year ago today (which is just weird) it felt like such a milestone for her, for me. It was so emotional that the little smile I had known for six whole years was changed forever, an emotion that also came with a sense of pride that we had come this far, of course it did change her face but no sooner had she lost those bottom teeth than new ones grew in its place, albeit not pearly white milk teeth like before, still, teeth.
This week however Eva has lost not one but two of her very top teeth and I just cannot get over how different it makes her look. I struggle to comprehend how she has instantly gone from my little girl to what feels like someone not only I will remember, but she will too. Seven just seems like one of those ages where her memories will not only be from me (and this here blog) but from her. She is making her own way in the world now and may always remember this face, this reflection and the time her dad flicked her tooth out to prevent yet another day of Eva keeping it in and twisting it around making everyone squirm!
She looks instantly different and so far I am not sure that I like it. I know that sounds awful but I just don’t know if I am ready to be a parent of this kind of child, I swear I am only trained enough to deal with babies and toddlers am I not!? I feel like I have that covered, I am good at that (give or take a tantrum or two) but I am not sure about being good enough now. How am I supposed to know what to do? How to handle the changes and still be the person she wants around all the time? At the moment every single time I look at her I am reminded of this. I guess it runs deeper than teeth.
If I thought the bottom ones were emotional, they were nothing compared to these. I am so proud of her don’t get me wrong and I know there are so many many more times ahead for us but every time I look at her I want to not only freeze time but rewind it. Bring back those milk teeth forever please!
I know that her new teeth will come through soon. No they might never be as tiny and perfect as the milk teeth that came before them, that she may take years to grow into them, but they will soon become her just like I became me. For now I will be thankful that I had taken some photos the day before they came out to hold onto my baby girl that little bit longer and not just look at that black hole in her mouth like something is missing rather than something more is to come.
**If youre reading this Eva you are still beautiful inside and out, but I know when your own children get to this age and all you can see is a huge gap and exposed gum you will know exactly what Mummy means. Love you to the moon and back gappy x