Solo Parenting {The Ordinary Moments #3}

Solo Parenting yellow rain coats

I won’t lie, this week has been a bit of a mixed one. Eddy has been working away in Spain since Sunday and so I have had almost an entire week of solo parenting. He works for a European company and whilst he frequently works away and that’s fine, the last few months he has cancelled trips due to me being unwell so this is the first time since I think October that he has actually gone. I am still not feeling 100%, neither are the children truth be told and whilst we have been just fine it has definitely felt like a tough old slog.

I have a love/hate relationship with solo parenting, on the one hand it is tough doing absolutely everything. Entertaining the children the whole time, never getting a minute to myself, doing double bedtimes and bathtimes, cooking all meals and clearing up, being the one to get up in the night and not really getting an evening at all in order to get ahead for the next day, it can be relentless and overwhelming. But then on the other hand there is also a part of me that really likes it. I kind of love that we go by the beat of our own drum, that there is no change of activity/routine when Daddy gets in and no expectation that someone will be there to help, I just get on with it and if I wanted to stay up till 1am blogging, I just do (in hindsight when the littlest woke up three times that night it wasn’t a great idea). I just tend to feel like there is calm and a different pace to life on our own.

This feeling usually lasts a few nights before I am requiring just a little bit of respite though and I do feel lucky that he never goes away for too long. Or when he does, like last summer when he was away for a month, we get to go with him. Years ago before we had children he would have to fly across the other side of the world, in a completely different time zone for up to 8 weeks at a time and I am more than thankful he doesn’t have to do that anymore.

On Wednesday he rang to say that he was having to go away again in a couple of weeks. To get up super early and be on a 6am flight. On Wednesday the 1st Feb. Roma’s 2nd Birthday.

Of course for both of us, for all of us this isn’t ideal and we thought long and hard about whether it was the right thing to do, but this is work. This is what allows us the lifestyle we have, the roof over our heads, the clothes on our back and the presents ready to open on such Birthdays as this. It’s an opportunity he can’t miss out on, a trip much harder than any other but a necessary one all the same. So even though he won’t be here when that day arrives, he will be here to celebrate the day before; and when you are 2, and basically get to have two birthdays, that is a pretty great result.

Eva herself has had a bit of a tough week too. I am not sure whether it is tiredness, her allergies which have been bad, being unsettled due to temporary staffing changes at school or the fact that I have mostly been exhausted, multitasking and not present in the moment as much as I would like this week, but she has been a little overwhelmed and sad. I hate to see her like this at any time but especially when I don’t feel like I have the time to really talk to her and make sure she is feeling secure before getting cross because she is shouting at her sister for being too close or crying at the smallest of things and all I want to do is say sorry and give her a cuddle.

So on Thursday after school pick up I decided we would head out, I had bought these gorgeous yellow raincoats from Tu at Sainsburys the day before to brighten up our moods and we all adore them (except for Eddy who thinks they look like fisherman or that they work for RNLI) so we put them to good use and went to get some fresh air. It really did us all the world of good and instead of getting on top of one another at home they ran and played so happily together. It was so beautiful to watch and feel in the moment as I hadn’t felt that all week and I felt so guilty about it. So guilty because I do have time to stop, to do this and to make sure that as much as the house is clean and tidy and everyone is fed, that we are all having a great time too. It has also actually resulted in some of my favourite photos I have taken of them for a while. Happy and relaxed little ladies and I look at them and think that despite the fact I definitely feel like I could do with a lie down, a cold flannel and maybe a weeks spa retreat, I did it, and not only are we all still alive, but they are really happy.

The love/hate relationship continues but for now I was overjoyed to hear the key in the door earlier than expected on Friday afternoon and I am more than happy to be sat here writing by myself whilst listening to them laugh at the simplest things downstairs. Right now I am quite happy not to be solo.

xx

Solo Parenting yellow rain coats Solo Parenting yellow rain coats Solo Parenting yellow rain coats Solo Parenting yellow rain coats Solo Parenting yellow rain coats Solo Parenting yellow rain coats Solo Parenting yellow rain coats Solo Parenting yellow rain coats Solo Parenting yellow rain coats

Linking with Katie Mummy Daddy Me & Donna What the Redhead said for the Ordinary Moments

 

18 comments

  1. Sherry says:

    Oh bless you I hope you are feeling better. It’s so hard having to solo parent when you’re not on form isn’t it? And these jackets! I saw your photos on IG and wondered where they were from, I might take to take a trip to Sainburys by us #TheOrdinaryMoments
    Sherry recently posted…Happy Birthday {Ordinary Moments 21/1/17}My Profile

    • Laura - Little Ladies Big World says:

      Thank you, I am doing ok although still not up to full strength but getting there slowly. Yes I saw them as I regularly go into the boys section and just had to have them. x

  2. Beth @ Twinderelmo says:

    I could have written this. My husband works away Monday to Friday every week and it’s so hard. He was away on our girls birthday too which was tough but probably harder for him. Like you say, he does this so I can stay at home and we can enjoy family life comfortably. But it’s lonely!
    Beth @ Twinderelmo recently posted…Blood Donation – The Ordinary MomentsMy Profile

    • Laura - Little Ladies Big World says:

      I have total respect for you doing this every week Beth, the birthday is going to be a tough one but you do have to put it into perspective don’t you? Although yes definitely a bit lonely too x

  3. Taryn says:

    My husband works long days with a commute to london and often leaves at 7am and home at 9am, meaning solo parenting days for me, they are tough but I know what you mean, the girls and I have our own little routine and it works, sometimes on his days off I crash, i find if i keep going i’m fine but when i stop…. you sound like you’re doing a fab job x
    Taryn recently posted…Little Things – The Ordinary Moments 2017 #3My Profile

  4. Laura - dear bear and beany says:

    Well done for surviving. Sole parentings is tough and I don’t do that often or for long periods. But I do know what you mean about going along at your own steam and when you know there is no help on the way you just seem to get on with it a little bit better. I love the coats x
    Laura – dear bear and beany recently posted…An Unexpected Ride In An Ambulance…The Ordinary MomentsMy Profile

    • Laura - Little Ladies Big World says:

      Thank you, yes you just keep going don’t you? Then it takes some time to get in the swing of things again I always find too x

  5. Gemma says:

    Oh bless you, i’m sorry you’ve had a tough item this week, solo parenting must be so difficult. I hope you are feeling better. What gorgeous photos, and I love the yellow jackets xxx

    • Laura - Little Ladies Big World says:

      Thank you, yes it definitely has its moments and especially when not feeling great but these coats could brighten up any day! x

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