Sisters – January 2017 {Siblings}

Siblings Sisters January on bikes

For my little sisters this month has definitely been a month of two halves. Of course first we had Christmas time. It was so magical and it made me melt to watch how they have changed in the last year. There is nothing like the same time of year to have the comparison of how far they have come. I remember last year when Roma was just 10 months old and although already walking about she had no real concept of what was going on. Yet fast forward 12 months and things couldn’t be more different. She understood and was so excited. It really made the time in our house even more special to have them get excited together, even if that meant it was manic at times and I had to ask them politely to calm down!

Christmas Day itself was really lovely, they were an absolute pleasure to be around, they shared and took turns and helped each other and we’re genuinely pleased for each other when they squealed that they had gotten what they had asked Father Christmas for. It was adorable. They shared their joint presents and played together and it was just about as utterly perfect as I could ever ask for from a 1 and 5 year old. And this continued for the week after and Eva’s birthday.

Eva had a little party at home and it was adorable to watch her include Roma with all her friends and for them to join in together. She spent the whole few days singing Happy Birthday to her every chance she could. It was utter bliss, I so wish i could bottle that feeling up and just like I had said last month they just seem to have found their groove and know so much about each other that their relationship is blossoming, and I think I also said that of course it comes with the thankfully rare squabbles….

Haha, well then came the second half. This last few weeks I feel like I have joined a club. An exclusive club that only mothers of siblings get to know. I have enjoyed the highs, bringing a sibling into the family and seeing their bond develop is one of the best feeling I have ever experienced and I think I say it in most of my monthly updates on them but I still find it amazing and surreal to watch. Yet this month it feels like a new club altogether.

The sibling rivalry/squabble/argue/antagonise/fight club.

Don’t get me wrong I don’t want to paint a picture of horror every minute of the day, they have still been full of lovely moments between them and you can still practically see the love that they have for each other, but oh my gosh they fight! Thankfully not actual fights, more arguments but I have lost count of how many times I have walked out of the room to instantly hear (insert whinging voice here) “Roma’s doing this” “Eva’s doing that” or a familiar scream of overreaction from either of them that the tiny stroke of affection or accidental brush past just about broke a limb! The back of the car seems to be prime argument territory when there is nowhere to go and I resort to either flat out ignoring them, demanding complete silence or adopting the phrase “give it a rest will you” something I never ever thought I would say.

And it is all too familiar. You see I think they fail to realise that I am a sibling. At the risk of sounding like an old person, I have actually been there and done that. I am one of three girls, the youngest of three girls born in four years. I see the shove that they think is out of sight, I see it, I know it and I feel it. I have done it, had it done to me and been on both the giving and receiving end of my fair share of told you so’s and laughing when the other gets told off or smirking because you know that in actual fact it was probably your fault too, or entirely.

They have of course had squabbles a little before with Roma learning how to share and Eva learning to be respectful of her younger siblings differing needs; but so far they have been few and far between. I don’t know what it has been about the last few weeks. Maybe it is the come down from Christmas and Eva’s birthday. Maybe it’s the fact that Eva has gone back to school and they need to learn the new routine all over again after adoring each other’s company over the festive season. Or maybe it is just one of those things that was always to come now Roma knows her own mind and Eva can’t get away with quite so much without protest.

It is exhausting and frustrating and I find myself raising my voice in frustration more than I am used to. However, I also find it really funny, I watch or listen with a knowing smile and know they have to learn together, I can’t force the dynamics and I know they will make that themselves. I know when to step in and teach valuable lessons and I know when to back off….for now.

I wouldn’t say I enjoy it and I would take best of friends all of the time in a heartbeat but it is also humbling to see. They are getting to know each other, having their own relationship that is separate to me and learning to feel for others and know boundaries too, they are growing up. And to have each other to do that with is something pretty special.

Sisterhood, siblinghood, is a bond like no other and one that knows no bounds. They can be the best of friends and the worst of enemies but there will always be love that holds those two together.

xx

I have to say that ironically I am not totally in love with these photos, I left it till the last minute (again) and for some reason there seems to be some focus issues on my camera and also some mood issues with the littlest. But I guess that pretty much sums up the last few weeks!
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28 comments

  1. Lucy says:

    I think siblings are always about equal parts push and pull; they push each other’s buttons, but then pull together. It’s definitely hard (and more than a little irritating) when they squabble and you become a referee, but I try and keep reminding myself how much they are learning about negotiating and relationships by arguing with their siblings. It makes it *slightly* easier to take! Beautiful photos of them both out adventuring with their bikes, too cute. x

    • Laura - Little Ladies Big World says:

      You are totally right, that is what I try and tell myself as I hide in the kitchen in the hope they wont come and find me to sort it out! x

    • Laura - Little Ladies Big World says:

      Not at all,I do stand there and laugh sometimes (which makes the of course very serious situation of a not at all broken toe much worse) because it takes me back to doing so with my sisters!

  2. natalie butcher says:

    Goodness me playing referee is hard work lol I think its healthy for them to overcome issues (even though it drives me mad raising my tone and repeating myself) but I guess lately I’ve seen the bigger girls trying to sort it out themselves (sometimes) and i guess it helps their bond in a roundabout way. I wonder how it’ll pan out in the teen years ahhhhhgh x
    natalie butcher recently posted…Our four in January 2017.My Profile

    • Laura - Little Ladies Big World says:

      Yes I do try and stand back and hide so they will sort it out but Eva always come to find me and Roma always hides! Says alot about their characters right there I think haha

  3. Jenny says:

    Oh yes siblings can be the ones that push each other’s buttons the most and the ones that can make it all feel better and comfort them the most too. It’s a back and forward throughout their lives together. But oh so beautiful to watch. Being referee is still hard I am nervous for the teenage years eeek. Look forward to the year of #siblingsproject ahead.

    • Laura - Little Ladies Big World says:

      Absolutely, I find it lovely to think that they feel secure enough to do this right now, I am certainly the same with my sisters even now x

  4. Laura - dear bear and beany says:

    I hear ya! My girls are like this and like yours they mostly love each other. But when they don’t, they don’t! I think being a sibling myself does help, as my husband who is an only child doesn’t get it at all. X
    Laura – dear bear and beany recently posted…The Love Of A Mum…The Ordinary MomentsMy Profile

    • Laura - Little Ladies Big World says:

      Haha this happens around here frequently too and the other is perplexed because they are just doing something nice!

  5. Fi Ni Neachtain says:

    How gorgeous they are in their matching jackets and with their bikes. I think all siblings fight and squabble, it’s just part of the package isn’t it? 🙂 #siblingsproject

    • Laura - Little Ladies Big World says:

      It certainly is yes, I will continue to hide in the other room with a cuppa and let them sort it out!!

  6. Taryn says:

    I think there is so much to learn from having a sibling, i like to think that when mine fight and fall out that they are learning skills to deal with inevitable conflict as they grow more independent and go off out into the world. It is exhausting though and having to constantly intervene is super frustrating. Gorgeous pics! Love their matching coats – i’m a fan of matching sisters as you know! x

    • Laura - Little Ladies Big World says:

      Yes I think it is the telling tales and intervening that is the most infuriating part because as we all know you never quite get the whole story! and thank you, yes matching is pretty awesome!! x

  7. Gemma says:

    I am with you on the sibling rivalry – my eldest two are really at that phase at the moment. I think it is a natural thing though, although I’m hoping it gets better as they get older (please?!). Gorgeous photos – love the bikes! xx

  8. Chloe McLoughlin says:

    I feel I’m in exactly the same position with my two boys. It can really be trying, I’m an only child so I feel at times I struggle to understand their little bond, but with a blink of an eye they’ll be all laughter! X

    • Laura - Little Ladies Big World says:

      It must be so hard to completely understand for you. I have the hindsight of oh so many fights with my sisters to let me know it is actually all ok and they don’t really hate each other! Definitely trying for us mummies though x

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